Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Renee Thompson's LiveJournal:

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Friday, October 12th, 2007
7:38 pm	Writers block Its pretty safe to say that after 25 weeks of no entries, that writers block may be a mild expression. However it also almost certainly means that there are unlikely to be any people reading, which may give me the little push I need to write as I feel. So a recap? Well, no. No point really. An excuse would be that facebook has taken on a new role in my life, and so recklessly I have pursued and navigated my way around the ubiquitous social networking world that it now is, for at least the last six months. Another would be that I have only recently stopped working 13 hour night shifts, so my spare time is no longer absorbed just by sleeping, working and well... not much else. As for summer, well it was short but sweet, and its now officially not summer. None of which are really the reason I havent been writing, and in resuscitating my live journal am I in no way abandoning my guilty facebook habit! No, the reason I am writing now is because I realise that my own personal need to write, and to write for no other sake than to write, has been suffering. I've just started a short course in freelance journalism, and my current assignment is to write a review (of something, anything), a task that is now incredibly daunting. Its daunting because in all honesty I dont trust my ability to write, havent done any recently, and don't know if I am even capable of writing a decent sentence to describe the desk I'm sitting at, let alone a paper of potentially publishable quality. So I'm scared. I hope if I start writing down things on here again I might conjure a valid voice that I want to share. Fingers crossed. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, April 16th, 2007
9:36 pm	Dreams and Nightmares Ok its time to write. I have felt quite out of sorts recently, despite the improvement in weather and spring's promises. A sort of empty, hollow lifeless feeling has remained with me since winter departed, and more disorienating, the origins have been quite hard to put my finger on. A somewhat stagnant and disapproving mindset has been following me around like a bad smell. Tonight, there are some realisations. (Most probably brought on by the knowledge that due to a beautiful anomoly in my shift schedule/rota, i have exactly one whole week off that I can do whatever i choose to with. A whole week! I have had fragments of a week, even up to five days off in a row before, but a full 7 days off is some kind of miracle in the shift working world. And just in time for my birthday, which falls on the 22nd, and just before I have to go back to work.) One of these realisations is that for the last month, in fact more like three, I have been very, very busy. Not just with work, but with running around the countryside catching up with people and escaping London for a good few days every second week it seems. Which is all very good and well (and what a nice work/life balance, right), but its easy to see how this has all caught up with me. Another chest infection this week (this time being a good girl and not smoking), and god you should see how manky my hair gets from working 4 x 12 hour days straight (not having time to wash my hair, let alone anything else). Throughout the last month I have had nightmares, fevers and and many many restless nights. I never feel rested, never get enough sleep, my back and neck aches constantly (i can blame work %100 for this symptom). And then there's the stress I face every minute at work, which is likely not close to any sort of pressure I have faced before. No wonder I come home some days wondering if life is worth living afterall, and then the constant questioning, hang on, was that happy travelling girl last year the same Renee I see now? What am I doing in this crazy freakishly stressful high pressure job? Its all the more crazy when you go away for four days, get a taste of the leisurely life (more than a weekend away feels like a holiday, right?), then just when your getting the hang of this freedom thing, your launched straight back into the thick of it, with a straight jacket and a pen and a computer screen that is burned into your retinas when you fall asleep that night. A more schizophrenic lifestyle, I would suggest there is not. But I'm getting used to it. Another thing I realised tonight, is that London feels different for me, I have spent so much time escaping it recently that it no longer feels like home. Moving house has been a good change of scenery, but I feel on the outer, my housemates barely see me or know me yet (i am either working, sleeping, or not in London), and also the most i see of London now is literally on the way to or from work, or to and from Elsewhere. Gone are the autumn days I spent walking around parks and museums and getting acquainted with Shoreditch art gallerys and hangouts. Its an abrupt and yet subtle change, I dont know where I want to fit here anymore. I suppose I miss Old Street, and the charity call centre i worked for there, and the people and experiences then. Its just strange that so many worlds seem to exist in the same city, and i seem to be in a different one than i was before. On the whole though, the novelty of the big city has worn off for the time being, i find myself dreaming instead about rural utopias and a more feudal existance. How this will all work out for me i dont know. I think about quitting my job every second day, on those days i find myself dreaming about weird and wonderful things i could be doing instead. Like, becoming an urban hippy having to squat and take lease in abandoned houses, scrawling poinant and clever graffiti over some of the least suspecting and therefore most attractive surfaces. (But then again... tonight i saw a punk sifting through rich peoples rubbish in the same manner and on the same street where i had seen a fox do exactly the same thing about a week ago, and while the similarities are worth musing, I understood the reality of it a bit more.) A far more realistic example is that I think about leaving London and moving to the far east to teach english, i have applied for a couple of TEFL courses, and this may be my best bet, i could easily work and study with the job i do. Ok that is all. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 20th, 2007
11:38 pm	Letting go I am happy to report an unexpected change of attitude in the last two days, something akin to relief even. It all started yesterday morning, the morning after my return ticket back to Australia flew home without me. An friendly email from home, a couple of reasonably good days at work, and settling into my new house may be a few contributing factors to a slight feel good feeling that, believe me, is well overdue for me. Its certainly got nothing to do with the weather that's for sure, the two weeks of spring warmth dissappeared on the day my ticket did, the temperature has dropped dramatically again, the wind is icy, we even had some snow flakes. The timing of this change of weather I initially thought would be some sort of bad omen, or sign that I should have left. But then again, I tend to get superstitious about ridiculus things. Lets just say that what ever it is, I am feeling better about things. Good. Heres a couple of photo's of my new home, taken last week when the sun was still shining, and the lovely garden I now share... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, March 16th, 2007
4:56 pm	Peripatetic Definition of 'Peripatetic' according to online dictionary: 1.One who walks from place to place; an itinerant. 2.Peripatetic: A follower of the philosophy of Aristotle; an Aristotelian. In line with the second definition, wikipedia describes "Peripatetics" as 'also sometimes used to describe those philosophers not having any fixed academy or building'. I came across this word in an article in the Metro today, it was used in the sentence... "she enters a peripatetic existance". I immediatlely enjoyed the word and upon reading its defintion and its connotations, enjoyed it more fully. This is all a nice segway to relating my own current situation and my one year anniversary of absence from Australia on the 22nd of March. I have finally, just today, decided to forfeit and cancel my return ticket home this Sunday to Melbourne, to continue my wanderings abroad. Its been a tough decision, the heartstrings have been pulling me very strongly recently with thoughts of home, and homesickness has taken on its true meaning in the last month or so. It has been touch and go all week this week, will i or wont i? Panic stricken i have woken up on more than one occassion thinking... what if i just went home for two weeks? (i cant afford it) Wouldn't that cure me from my current homesickness/lonliness? (maybe/maybe not) Why the hell do i want to be apart from my family and friends any longer? (but family and friends will be there whenever you do get back) What am i doing in London, still? (la la la, london still -sorry couldnt resist The Waif's reference) Because, because, because... I don't know? Peripatetic or Very Pathetic? Either way, I feel a little relieved to have finally made a decision (with two days to go you would expect as much hey), even if it is something i may question now, i hopefully will not question it too much in the next coming months. This weekend, I am going to get very drunk to forget that i had a plane to catch in a parallel universe. (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 12th, 2006
10:14 pm	I Heart Hackney I've just returned from a casual Sunday stroll around Shoreditch, once again reassured that I'm in the right place. I love the artistic feel of this area, it oozes out of bars, dirty off licences, bohemian hang outs and graffiti covered, poster clad brick lanes. I also read this morning in the local paper that Hackney has more artists per square mile than any other place in all of Europe. One of the great things I'm discovering about this area is the amount of brilliant art exhibits/galleries dotted around. On the timeout website this morning I came across a photography exhibition at Flowers East called 'After the flood' by Robert Polidori, who has visually documented the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in the streets and houses in New Orleans. It finished today, and I'm glad I got the chance to see these stunning photographs. Still scenes of the water damage ravaged on cars, trees, home interiors and personal belongings are almost beyond belief, and yet the photographer’s use of large prints, natural light and an honest eye helps to bring the viewer up close and personal with the eerie reality of the devastation. The pictures evoke anger and disgust that this large scale nightmare imposed on the citizens of New Orleans could have even happened in the first place. There is a great short review of the exhibition on the timeout website by Sarah Kent, who proposes that the photos do more than just highlight the physical devastation of the city, they highlight the wide social division between the rich and poor of this city, the latter of whom were significantly worse off before and significantly more affected by the hurricane when it hit. Ok, back to how much I love Hackney, its culture and its inhabitants. The inspiration I am drawing from all sorts of sources is tremendous. I am further affirmed by the sheer amount of artists I seem to be meeting at the moment - my housemate is an animator, a friend of mine from work is also studying animation, at the charity call centre there are so many writers, journalists, musicians, actors, and artists. Needless to say, it all feels creatively inspiring. I'm realizing it's rubbing off on me, I am happy about this. I can't stop writing and reading, it's like a disease. I'm now once again looking forward to studying again, hopefully along the freelance journalism bent I was talking about a month ago, although it wont be until Jan next year at the earliest. Which is fine, I have other projects I want to work on between now and then. I also have to contend with my new job which starts Monday week, which I'm now a little apprehensive about, not sure if I'll enjoy myself as much as I have been at the charity call centre, although at least it will pay a hell of a lot more. (Comment on this)
Saturday, November 11th, 2006
11:32 pm	Dreams and Nightmares Just finished watching ‘Requiem for a Dream’, my second or third viewing, yet just as emotionally compelling, visually confronting, and thought provoking as the first viewing. The difference is that I recall feeling quite freaked out by it the first time I watched it, perhaps largely because of the heavy drug themes and the parallels with clouded issues in my own life at the time. While it remains an unsettling film, and this it’s intention, this time, however, I found the underlying message with far more ease and clarity. The message is a direct one that is reinforced through the unraveling of each of the characters demise: dreams can turn into nightmares all too easily in this world, and all the more quickly when we get caught up in ourselves and the selfish pursuit of our own desires. I feel this emotional message talking to me quite personally when I look back on my own past, and yet can now draw hope out of this darkness, because I have survived my own nightmares while my dreams live on. The other compelling aspect was found in the special features section, in particular, the footage of a casual discussion between the writer, Hubert Selby Jr, and one of the lead characters, Ellen Burstyn (who plays the doped up mother). A rather candid interview, where Hubert discusses how he came to be a writer, and the spiritual turn that his life took when he realized he did not want to die without living first. I liked many things about this writer: he believes he was born with rage, and anger at the world he was presented with upon arrival; he believes that suffering is the main currency by which humans can really relate to each other; and that it is important for him to explore the darker aspects of life through his writing, that in order to arrive at solutions the world must first be confronted with the problems. There was a random interesting comment he made about the physical eye, suggesting that the word ‘eye’ in ancient sanscript/Hebrew actually translates as something like ‘fountain’, meaning that rather than the eye being a filter for incoming visual messages, that it actually projects visual messages outwards– we project our own view onto the world rather than just interpret outside reality. I drew much inspiration from watching the making of the film as well, and really had to appreciate the sheer amount of hard work, dedication and focus that creative people working on all sides must have put in to the films production - from the writer, director, producer and actors, right the way down to the people setting up the cameras, sets and makeup/special effects artists. I feel really drawn to the idea of being a part of a team of people working towards a collective vision, and the film industry in particular, where there are so many talented, creative people all playing their small part in constructing a piece of the film’s puzzle (which it really must be until the final touches in the editing room, certainly). (Comment on this)
Monday, November 6th, 2006
11:07 pm	Brighton, Bonfires and Back to it Well. Quite a weekend. I've just returned from Brighton tonight. Brighton was more beautiful the second time around, much walmer and brighter than in April when I was there last. Full of small old cobbled streets, rows and rows of white houses, warm inviting pubs and so many brilliant, smiling, friendly faces. I hurried myself on down there (with Alex in tow) on Saturday night after work, in the hope of possibly catching The Flaming Lips show, as Belle had scored free tickets after meeting them in a hotel. Didn't get there in time, so instead we headed out to Lewes (a 10 min train ride out from Brighton) to catch the biggest bonfire in England for Guy Fawkes night, armed with four bottles of wine and determined spirits. Arrived at Lewes at about 1130 to witness streams of bodies lining up on mass to catch the last train back to Brighton, so we knew we were swimming against the tide, marching onwards to the fire, although it was obvious we had missed the majority of the celebrations. We did however, catch the tail end of a costume clad, music playing, drum beating, fire stick weilding procession of pagans... followed them until we could no more, then turned out heels and followed our noses trying to sniff out this mother of all fires (not too difficult to find as it were). By the time we arrived, certainly the bonfire would have been a mere shadow of its former self, but still the burning rubble itself amazingly stood almost the height of a one story building. We drank, we were merry. Until a young group of local 'waterloo' kids (wearing red and white stiped tops we had seen on previous fire bearers) turned up with fire sticks, large quantities of alchohol and bad attitudes, and generally started interoggating and intimidating everyone still sitting around the fire. One amusing aspect of these tactics was to begin accusing some of the more 'relaxed' bonfire folk that they were on 'MDMA', and violently insisting that these 'druggies' were not welcome. Well, I say amusing, but really, it became more of a lesson in how useless peaceful diplomacy can be in the face of ignorance and blind aggression. Having a chat to one of the less hostile youth, I discovered that the reason for this type of behaviour on behalf of the striped gang was more to do with the 'authority' they perceived they had been given to look after the fire- they were effectively policing the rubble- and despite their own unruly behaviour, this sort of power gave them the freedom to do whatever they thought neccessary. I've never felt more sorry for a bunch of directionless kids in my life, and shudder to think that they may one day as adults hold positions of any kind of authority, if this is what they think its good for. Knowing we had missed the last train back to Brighton, we were resigned to sleep fireside for the eve, and when morning broke we stumbled bleary eyed back to the station, only to miss the first train and just catch the second. Aching, hungry and tired, we arrived back in Brighton to realise at the gate that because we did not have valid tickets for that day (only valid for the night before) that we had all incurred an additional £20 penalty fee. In my tired state, I laughed with the serious-looking uniformed men thinking it was a farce, and even tried convincing myself it was just a bad practical joke that they were playing on someone noted for being a notoriously bad morning person. After pacing in angry circles for about 20 seconds, next thing I knew, I was jumping the 6 ft barricade on the far side of the station and escaping like a prisoner on the run. Leaving Alex, Belle and Mark to face the music, I realised, stupidly, afterwards. Fortunately for them and I, my escape went by undetected, and they did not have to cover my fee. Although unfortunately they didn't escape their own fines so easily. Actually, I'm glad to say that after this point the rest of the weekend passed by somewhat uneventfully. It was great spending a bit more time walking around Brighton, eating food, passing time and just being somewhere else. There is so much sky, so much sea, so much space down there. A different pace. Now I'm back in London where the contrast is all too much, once again I find myself questioning what draws me to this big, dirty, friendless city so strongly. There is a heaviness in the air and attitude here in London which has struck me more acutely tonight. And as if all these contrasts were not already so prominent in my head this evening, on my way back to my flat from the bank not an hour ago... a girl burst into tears as she walked passed me, prompting me to stop, turn around, and ask... are you alright? Nothing, she must have mumbled as she turned away, and maybe mistook my London presence to mean that as one stranger to the next, chances are I didn't care. I wish she knew, that today of all days, in this of all cities, that I did. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 2nd, 2006
11:08 pm	Taking a stand Not sure if I was going to sink or swim this week, a range of emotions causing me to withdraw, question and reassess things. But I'm ok. I feel quieter, calmer, stronger. I caught up with fellow aussie traveller Kate (whom I met in Prague) last weekend, was good to see her again and chat about random Australian news and goings on. She is heading back to Brisbane this week after a year or so abroad, amid a little apprehension about returning home again. I can certainly understand that feeling, it must be strange to consider settling in back home. But catching up with her was a timely reminder about my travels earlier this year, and it was great to see her. To borrow a format Kate used in her emails to communicate what she got up to on her travels, I've compiled a short list of what's hot and what's not in my life (and other random bits and peices) at the moment: HOT - lazy mornings: waking up at 11am in the morning and not having to start work til 1:30pm. i only have another 2 weeks left of this kind of bliss (before my new job starts), so making the most of it while it lasts. - coincidences: finding out that the laptop I am about to purchase is from a guy who lives at the same flat I was staying at when I first arrived in London. - australians: friends/family/travellers back home, here and abroad. you all rock. - music: can't get enough of The Smiths and Joy Division at the moment. dark, but fitting. - bonobos: apparently these animals substitute sex for aggression at almost every opportunity, and enjoy a happier, more peaceful society for it. good for them. - bonfires: looking forward to guy fawkes night this weekend, apparently it goes off (ahem). - lookalikes: at my work there seems to be a plethora of people who look like other people... theres a Seth Green, a Harry Potter and a Richard Ashcroft. NOT - phones: im either talking on one at work for 7 hours a day, or getting frustrated at my mobile's growing inabilty to produce any decent audio while im talking on it. - long distance relationships: i know so many people doing this, and its crazy. - winter: dont think im prepared for it yet, it's getting really cold now. - bad habits: smoking too much, not eating properly (working late), and not sleeping well to name a few. - hibernation: i need to get out more (ahh, money. its always about the money). - fireworks: i know this is pretty jumpy of me, especially in the lead up to guy fawkes as there seems to be fireworks almost every night here in central London, but every time i hear a loud explosion i think a bomb is going off. plus they are just getting annoying. (Comment on this)
Sunday, October 29th, 2006
10:30 pm	the truth will set you free Darkness has descended. The clocks turned back last night, now its getting dark at 5pm, its only going to get darker from here on in. And colder. Walking around Bricklane and Spitafields today was great until my hangover from last night's outings well and truly set in, I escaped the chaos in my brain by imagining all the buildings and people around me where just fronts for some matrix type system of imposed order. Tried to imagine it all falling away in front of my eyes, and what sort of reality it might expose. Once again, feeling a strong urge to buy some paints and canvas. And to write incessantly. But I can't quite find the words to express at the moment. Hmmm, life is a funny thing. Now that I've offically postponed my return flight back home til March next year, I have renewed pangs of homesickness... made more acute by my sister Jess' and my Mum's birthdays this week, speaking to them both over the phone made me feel very close but so far away. As October draws to to a close, there's a certain stillness emerging within me that has been born out of a month of some fairly intense personal self revelations, and a resolute desire to keep building on these. (Comment on this)
Monday, October 23rd, 2006
11:32 am	The world is watching Hiding out in my house to save money is getting a little tiresome, I'm getting itchy to explore new parts of London, get out more, and meet new people. All in good time, I'm just waiting to unleash myself on the world now. Haha. This morning I had a bath with the door open, so I could listen to my favourite album of the moment(Gnarles Barkley - St Elsewhere) at full blast... only to realise after I got out that Yu my housemate was still here (he's never here in the morning!), and probably copped an earful of my music and (awful) singing, and perhaps a bit of an eyefull as he was waking up too. Whoops. Just came back from my volunteer mentoring programme in Holloway Road, I really love the girl I'm working with, she's a beautiful person, I really want to help her get a job. Feels good to want to help someone, and to find out what its like out there for someone who has little job skills, and little english skills. Back to Gnarles Barkley, I can't stop playing the album on repeat and at full volume evertime I get the chance, I f%@king love it. I'm just a little worried I'm engaging in a little overkill. Anyone who hasn't heard it, should. It's great. Ok, rant over. (Comment on this)
Thursday, October 19th, 2006
11:04 pm	Doubts I just like to write. I feel this knot of inexpressed feeling welling up inside me, and writing it down is all I can think of doing. I wish I had some paint and some canvas with me now. Ok so many of you may know that I live in a bubble. It's a world full of nicety, fantasy and bulls$%t but it gets me through the day. What gets you through? Sometimes, this bubble bursts, abruptly. Sending your own vision of the universe into chaos, and perhaps this is the truth of it. Right now, I wish I could transform myself into some creative genius, capable of turning an angry mess of an individual into some brilliant superhero. Capable of breathing and living colour. Capable of stringing even one intelligent sentence together. Or even metaphorically vomitting any inner ignorance to purge all this bulls$%t and attain some fragment of self realisation. How many blank canvases have gone to waste in the landscape of my mind? I purge, I purge, I purge. I scream and writhe in the lost expression of this artistic freedom. Kaledescopic pin prick bubble bursts colour shatters chards shimmy. shit. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 17th, 2006
11:58 am	Comings and goings October has been a busy month so far. A time where things have started to fall in place. I've finally made a decision about what I'm doing, have decided to stick it out in London til March next year, just have to organise to postphone my return ticket. I've landed a second job which starts in about a month, and I'm happy about having some decent income coming in over the winter. Still working for the charity call centre, which seems to keep me motivated because it doesn't really feel like work half the time. This week I've started volunteering as a mentor for people who have been out of employment for a long time, it feels great to finally put some of my counselling/psych skills from my uni days to good use. Belle's arrival back from Spain/Morocco last week was a timely one, great to see her again, hear about some of her travel stories, and generally just catch up on anything and everything going on in our lives respectively. I had her and Nicko and another friend over here on Friday night, was great to get drunk and play cards, sort of reminded me of a few well spent nights back in Melbourne, Richmond in particular. Strangely comforting. So many things have to be organised this month, im spending all my spare time trying to sort out Australian tax stuff, Jessica's 21st present, James stuff to be sea mailed, and trying to find a home for my cat Jasper back home. I also need to buy a laptop at the end of the month. I'm still struggling for money, only just scraping by to pay rent again this month. On the horizon I can see some light though, its just around the corner, soon I won't have to worry so much about not having enough to live on. Until then though, I have to make about £20 last me two weeks! At the moment, the constant flow of emails from friends and family back home and around the world makes me feel really happy, and loved. I'll try to attach more photos soon, for everyone to see as well. (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 3rd, 2006
4:01 pm	The peice that fits It's all beautiful right now. I'm embracing the coming winter with open arms. The trees and grass are looking greener, the mornings are getting fresher and the night air is getting cooler. And, I've been a great mood for what seems like forever now, brought on by my first pay check in a month, a fun weekend, and a general sense of good humour about everything. I've also met a great guy called Joe at work, he's from Melbourne, lived a few streets away from my old house on Brunswick St, and seems already like a long lost friend I've always known but never met, strangely familiar. We've figured we must know other people from around Fitzroy/Brunswick/Northcote (funnily enough we both know a girl called Pixie Lou, but weirdly not the same one!), and that we used to work around the corner from each other in Prahran. In any case, he's a great find and it's amazing to have such an instant and familar connection with someone. Great too to finally be able to go out on the weekend (and by that I simply mean being able to afford a beer or two at a bar or two), although got a bit too excited of course and spent more money than I have in two weeks (£50) in two nights, but hey it was worth it. Also went to see Jurassic 5 on Sunday night with Alex, so much fun, they went to such lengths (or heights rather) to get the crowd involved and on the whole seemed like a very down-to-earth/friendly sort of bunch, albeit ones who can sing prose really, really well. My first live hip hop experience too, I must say hip hop I do 'dig' (to pinch one of Alex's brilliant northerner expressions). Can't wait to get to see more live music in the next coming months, I think The Knife are coming here in November, so planning on checking them out amongst other acts too. I also discovered this week that my premonitions last week were right... there was a third unknown unsettling factor that had yet to reveal itself. I had Alex dossing on my couch all last week and hadn't really had a chance to give Yu any notification of this... needless to say he was a little concerned about discovering an extra body living on the couch. Anyway it has all been confronted now, I had a feeling something was wrong on the home front, and this confirmed it. Fortunately, this weekend Alex found a place, all between Yu and I is now ok, and the natural balance of things has now been restored. Music I am listening to at the moment: Divinity by Amorphous Androgynous. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 25th, 2006
10:33 am	The number three For the most part, I think I knew I wouldnt end up going back to Morocco this time. This became clearer when I tried to book my last minute flight, and realised my credit card was suspended. Dissapointing, but at the same time a bit of a wake up call about getting my shit together, and sticking it out another week in London finally paid off, I found a job working for charity really close to home, Im really enjoying it so far. The only irony about all this is that there seems to be an assortment of new adverts on the tube and train stations everywhere in London advertising cheap Moroccan adventures, just to rub it in. So there have been two things in the last week that have come up that have to be sorted out soon, I'm waiting on a third to crop up now (because things come in threes, right.) Firstly, an email from Nick letting me know he is moving out soon and can't look after Jasper (my big white fat cat... i miss him) anymore, which means I'm now scrambling to find someone back home willing to take him in (anyone?!). Secondly, it seems I'll soon be loosing my beloved wireless internet and computer access, its time to send back James' laptop amongst his other things I've been looking after since July. But I've had a good run with it all so I can't complain, many thanks to James for letting me borrow the laptop for so long. All it really means is that I am going to have to try and buy a new laptop sooner rather than later, I simply don't think I can live without one. So what else? I've just started learning how to juggle (its all about three you see) which is something I've been wanting to learn for a while. I've got other things on the horizon at the moment too, now that I've finally got some income again, I'm planning on taking up a dance class in my spare time, and when I come up with £300 I want to start an online journalism course I've been looking into for some time. With all this, and trying to find another job (on top of the one I've got), I think I'm going to be quite a busy lady in the next few months. But it will keep me out of trouble, and hopefully help me save some money to travel next year too. So... as a final ode to the last month of idleness and recreation, heres some pictures I took of myself in the bath when I was bored last week and experimenting with the way my hair looked underwater (theres no nudie ones ok): (Comment on this)
Monday, September 11th, 2006
7:39 pm	Domestic blues So there have been a few minor mishaps and dissapointments. A series of problems with the flat mark the major developments in my life this week, starting with the temporary loss of all power to the flat last Monday night (we have pay as you go electricity), and ending with the complete loss of functioning drainage in our kitchen sink (which has also meant we can't use the washing machine). As a result, cooking is problematic because it's not easy to wash up afterwards and I can't afford to eat out, and on top of this I am going to have to handwash all my clothes in the bath tub (which has also been a source of frustration, the shower doesn't work so I have to have a mini-bath every day). The real estate agent is apparantly sending out a plumber in the next few days, but they can't even get in contact with the landlord, so I'm not that hopeful. Ahh, domestic bliss I hear you say? Not having that much luck on the job front, either. Which is partially due to the lack of enthusasiam I'm presenting at job interviews for positions I'm not really interested in. Not that I can afford to be picky, but at the moment I'm just not comfortable taking a job in a call centre, because I'd rather not. But that said, any sort of job is likely what I'm going to have to do soon, it's looking grim. To make matters slightly more interesting, then, I'm thinking about temporarily ditching my job hunting, jumping on a plane to Morocco, and catching up with Belle, Sally and Kelly once more for a week. Not exactly the wisest thing for me to do right now financially im sure, but it sounds good to me right now. Of course it means a larger credit card debt, but I've got to a point where the debt is now just so big, whats an extra £200?? Maybe when I get back from Morocco I can actually find some inspiration to find a job? It's just so crazy, it might work. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, August 31st, 2006
11:45 pm	London Vacation? Well, what a week it's been, back in London. I waved goodbye to Belle at Liverpool Station on her way off to Spain after our brief reunion and trip up to Scottland, met up with a mate of mine down here from Manchester, and in between looking for work and loafing about the house, have spent the rest of the week leisurely cruising around parts of London Ive never seen before, taking in a lot of free fun stuff. Walking or busing around London definately beats the tube, which I'm determined to avoid at all costs now that I'm not working and dependant on it. We managed to avoid public transport, most of the time. I really enjoyed the feeling of walking around London, not as a tourist, but just as an interested observer with time on their hands. Quite unlike how I felt on my visit through here in April, which was rushed and not altogether enjoyable, and also unlike my return here in late June, when I basically had to start work as soon as I could. In retrospect, however, it appears that somewhere in the middle of all this free fun, Ive also spent £150 (about $375 aust) in four days. Now, to begin with, I didnt get close to spending this much in Edinburgh in the week I was there and I did a lot more. Secondly, given my current dire (unemployed and seriously in debt) financial status, and the fact that I have tried to be incredibly careful with my money this week, this amount is ridiculus. So I thought I'd write a little list to warn myself (and others) about the risk of ever thinking again that London can be 'ok' for the budget conscious traveller: Monday - phone credit (£10), international calling card (£5), Movie(Severence) (£10), two bottles wine (£10). Tuesday - bus to Liverpool Station, walk along the Thames (free), walk along the Millenium Bridge (free), oyster card top up ($5), afternoon at Natural History Museum (free), sunset in Hyde Park (free), dinner on Bricklane (£30). Wednesday - Hamley's Toy Store (free), lunch at coffee shop in West End (£10), Buckingham Palace (free), retop up oyster card (£10). Thursday - walked to interview near Liverpool Street, lunch (£5), visit art book store in Hoxton, by two beers to sit in Hoxton Square Park (£5), food for dinner (£10), credit for gas to cook dinner (£20). ...which brings me up to the present. Ok, looking back, I probably should have not gone to that movie, drunk that wine, or had that nice Indian food either. But even still putting these aside for a moment, I would never have guessed how much my so called free week would end up costing me! So basically, despite the illusion that ive had free fun, ive actually, stupidly, managed to spend an average of about £35 per day the last four days. I need a job, and soon. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, August 28th, 2006
1:05 pm	Edinburgh Festival Arrived home last night after a week spent in Edinburgh, it was a timely break from work (which i quit last week), my personal problems, and London. It was great to catch up with Rach and also Sal and Kel, who just arrived in the UK from South America this week. The festival itself was incredible, a massive arts festival covering everything from fringe artists to a writers fest and a film fest, and of course, dozens of comedians. We didnt get to see half of the shows we had wanted to, not only would this have cost us a fortune, but there was just so much on, the choice was overwhelming. Some of the highlights were getting to meet Wil Anderson (from JJJ in oz) in person before his sell out show, and also getting to hang out and smash it up with the guys from Morph (an electronic/instrumental band from Melbourne)after meeting them through one of Rach's aussie mates Kully. For me however, the biggest highlight was the city itself, I loved just walking around the streets, soaking in the creative atmosphere, taking in the grand old buildings, and having the opportunity to share this with some great people. I love the city, Id love to move there. I might do this in the next month or two, if things dont come together for me back here in London. Heres a few photos of the festivities... Fringe fun... Belle at Melbourne Place... an appropriate pic given the amount of melbournian performers/travellers we met here! These guys were great... love the scottish. This street performer was quite scary to look at, she held a guiness world record for the amount of facial peircings she had, and there were many. This guy was a crowd favourite and a personal favourite of mine... the 'pish' dolls could all sing, headbang and play instruments individually. Impressive! Kelly, Rach and Belle Edinburgh castle by night (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 20th, 2006
4:55 pm	The Weekend Haven't done all that much this weekend, on account my personal life almost completely falling apart in the last few days, Ive been busy reassessing my life and trying to pick up the peices. Oh, I did get a chance to organise my room though, so a bit of interior decorating kept me occupied for a bit. I quit my job on Friday, so Im looking forward to going to Edinburgh this week to check out Edinburgh Festival, catch up with some friends, and generally get away from London for a bit. Went to Brick Lane and Spitafields market with Yu this morning, which has pretty much been the highlight of my weekend. Thought id take the opportunity to post a few pix of my new room and new house... how fab is it?! This is the view out my room window, a little fuzzy i think it was raining. My favourite toy... James laptop!! East facing window = nice sunrises Welcome to my room... ... and from another perspective. cute kitchen! the lounge ...the view from the lounge ...and the perfect start to a Saturday morning, coffee, cigarettes and the paper. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 16th, 2006
7:28 pm	Getting Sorted Hiya Ok, so its been a while since ive been on here, but finally with wireless broadband at my fingertips and a little bit of time up my sleeve, I can finally start uploading some of my favourite stories and pics to share with ya'll from the last couple of months and before even. So what have I been up to lately then? Well, Ive been living in London for now coming up to two months 'dossing', looking for sharehouses became a full time recreational activity for a while, but just this weekend gone I found a permanent pad. I feel quite lucky after looking at a lot of dives and basically getting disheartened about the whole thing, found a decent sized not too expensive room in a great part of East London, close to where I was staying before, closer still to trendy arty spots like Brick Lane and Hoxton/Shoreditch. My flatmate is an animator and has loads of great stuff lying around, and seems pretty relaxed although he works crazy hours. But I feel at home, at long last. Speaking of home, I suffered from my first real attack of homesickness last week, received a bunch of photos from back home, I cried. But with only 12 hours now til I get to see my beautiful Melbourne soulmate Belle again, I can't see too much to complain about! Anticipating her arrival like a rain hungry farmer watching a storm cloud take shape on the horizon. Waiting for the tears and memories and madness to flow. But, no time for tears now. Heres a few pics anyway (quite randomly chosen) from some of my travels around Europe earlier this year... more to come. The view of Fez (Morocco) from the rooftop we were sleeping on. This is me with a backpacker called Chris I met in Barcelona. My Moroccan travel buddy Megan and I, we are on the ferry ride back to Spain. Kids in Morocco San Sebastian, one of the most beautiful sunsets I have ever seen. Graffiti wall in London Dry aqueduct, Girona, Spain. Sunset in Girona. Eva and I in a forest with a bar, in Girona, just outside Barcelona, last night in Spain. (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 10th, 2006
11:26 pm	Going Nowhere The alleged unravelling of the latest ‘terror plot’ last night, and the subsequent hyped up security at Heathrow airport today, has raised my eyebrows somewhat. The first warning signs came as I boarded the tube at Golders Green, the second when I saw the crowds at Camden. The third came as I sat down to dinner tonight, and heard the first snippets of news reports thrown at me via the boob tube. What I witnessed at this point was a reaction similar to the panic that I recall sweeping Melbourne earlier this year, when we discovered our own ‘terror network’ in our backyard, albeit the latter being on a much grander scale. Even so, in my opinion the reaction to the capture of 21 alleged ‘masterminds’ in and around London and the UK last night seems a little overzealous. I mean stepping up security is one thing, checking for liquid substances on every man, woman and child coming in and out of the country, is another. And it begs a few important questions. Is this the best the powers that be can come up with? Checking every bag, every bottle of water, every chap stick for traces of chemical solvents? Not that the fear factor being pushed through all this is something to brush off lightly, I mean how else do we communicate to the masses that this is a REAL threat, otherwise, why would we be so thorough? As if sheer bureaucracy and miles and miles of red tape is going to help us understand the current political climate better. Far from it, heightening security at Heathrow airport, the busiest airport in the world, as a post hoc method of addressing this issue is only going to illuminate what a paranoid state of affairs all of this really is. Unless of course they actually do find numerous, quantifiable, dangerous chemicals stashed away in liquid guise, it certainly seems to be an effective way to incite fear in commuters and an exercise in security hyperbole. And anyway if its all true, is there anyone out there who actually struggles to make the link between the current war Israel is engaging in with Lebanon and another potential terrorist attack waiting to happen? Not that I’m condoning an attack on the West just because we’ve pissed off a few too many nations in the Middle East (those damn ‘Islamic Fascists’, right Bush?), but is it that much of a leap to assume the US and its allies are now more open to attack from extremists who for a number of reasons are already predisposed to the occasional suicide bomb? And if I’m to take this line of thinking one step further, wouldn’t we now also be more vulnerable to psychological warfare in the form of mass propaganda? At the risk of sounding a little controversial, I wouldn’t be surprised to see that no substantial evidence actually comes of all these ‘liquid’ security checks at Heathrow and London’s surrounds, simply because it seems a tad coincidental to me that such a ‘conspiracy’ to attack the States exists at exactly the same time as an American backed Israeli war in the Middle East. But it’s a great distraction, don’t you think? (Comment on this)